Hello there my friend...
How are you doing this day?
Ever praying for your comfort and joy...
Have you ever taken my stress test?
I created this stress test to help raise awareness to some stressful habits a person may have.
This is not a diagnosis tool or a psychology test, it is a test I developed many years ago to help identify stressful behavior.
This survey was not developed via hard research, and the stressful habits presented are not in any particular order. These are THE STRESSFUL HABITS that have been brought to my attention via survey from the many classes I have taught to relieve stress.
This is for adventure, education, and enjoyment.
So, enjoy...
ANSWER THE FOLLOWING QUESTIONS BY CHOOSING A NUMBER BETWEEN 1 AND 5. (1)NEVER (2) ALMOST NEVER (3) OCCASIONALLY (4) FREQUENTLY (5) ALL THE TIME
1. Do you worry?
2. Do you experience a racing mind?
3. Are you angry moody or irritable?
4. Do you lose your temper or become impatient easily?
5. Do you have trouble falling asleep, staying asleep, or getting essential hours of sleep because you can't stop thinking of things you have to do or because you have too much going on in your life?
6. Do you binge on or are you addicted to a certain activity, food, caffeine, tobacco, alcohol, or any form of pharmaceutical, over the counter, or illegal drug?
7. Are you in a hurry?
8. Do you set simple goals or continuously tell yourself you are going to do something and don't do it?
9. Do you feel like you are in a constant state of going nowhere?
10. Do you notice that it is important to you or you spend a lot of energy proving you are right, or things should be done the "right way", your way?
11. Do you frequently complain about people, places, and things?
12. Do you get offended easily and/or talk negatively about other people?
13. Are you unable to enjoy yourself even when you are doing something you enjoy?
Add up your results...
If you would like to utilize a truth scale, ask someone, who knows you really well, to take this test on your behalf, and then compare answers.
Okay...
1-13 a very destressed person
14-25 almost always destressed
26-38 more often destressed than stressed
39-52 you need to destress yourself
53- 65 you seriously need to destress yourself
If you chose 5 for any of the questions above, you may want to destress that particular habit.
For example, if you answered a 5 on number 6, you may want to overcome and eliminate the very stressful habit of addiction.
This stress test is part of my first book, "How to Destress Via Stress Test & Stress Relief". If you haven't read it, and would like to, Amazon is promoting the eBook free this Sunday, September 29, 2019.
Grab your free copy by clicking here.
Or
Stay tuned for updated posts on how to destress the stressful habits in the stress test. I've come a long way since I wrote that book in 2013, and I'd like to revisit each stressful habit with what I have learned since.
Wonderful day to you dear one...
Speak soon...
Elizabeth
Showing posts with label stressful habits. Show all posts
Showing posts with label stressful habits. Show all posts
Friday, September 27, 2019
Friday, September 13, 2019
How Do I Destress Myself?
Hello there my dear friend.
How do I destress myself is the question I'd like to answer this day.
How are you doing?
Ever hoping and praying that you are destressed.
Last night I spoke with a person who was overwhelmed. This person was really having a bad day, and worked him/herself into a hot stressed out mood.
Looking from the outside in, the situation was not really as bad as the person was making it but, as human beings we tend to self-talk ourselves into catastrophe when it really isn't so bad. What I mean is, sometimes, as humans, we act like someone is going to die when the situation really isn't that serious.
The reason I am saying this is because I use to do it, and I see it happen all the time. People running around in circles in their mind, and verbally as though it's the end of the world when no one is dying or is going to die.
Why do we do it?
We do it because it is a habit, and like I wrote in my last post, Wanting More From Life, we sometimes don't know our own authority and power to govern the mood, and words of our mind.
What I mean by that is, we can consciously sooth our self, and make it a habit, just as we unconsciously work our selves up into a frenzy over no thing.
A really good way to destress is to consciously focus on encouraging the self, and soothing the self into a better mood.
I discovered this for myself when I was a young EMT (Emergency Medical Technician). When I responded to 911 emergency calls, I could, and would sooth anyone on scene, and later learned I developed a really good habit that I used on myself. This habit of soothing myself replaced the all too often freak out factor I learned from my human conditioning.
The best way to calm yourself on a regular basis is through meditation, and a reminder.
You can read a bout meditation by clicking here.
You can create a reminder by repeating to yourself your desired outcome, for example, "I'm alright, and I'm doing really, really, really good!" It sounds silly, yes? But that reminder, any reminder, can, and will help a person calm themselves especially if they have a habit of freaking out over little things.
Try it, you won't be sorry. But don't just try it, make it a habit, and it will help with calming, and building confidence, which is the opposite of stress, which is most often displayed via anger, anxiety, and depression.
That's all I got...
A simple way to change a stressful habit.
Have a wonderful week my friend.
God bless you...
Speak soon...
Elizabeth
How do I destress myself is the question I'd like to answer this day.
How are you doing?
Ever hoping and praying that you are destressed.
Last night I spoke with a person who was overwhelmed. This person was really having a bad day, and worked him/herself into a hot stressed out mood.
Looking from the outside in, the situation was not really as bad as the person was making it but, as human beings we tend to self-talk ourselves into catastrophe when it really isn't so bad. What I mean is, sometimes, as humans, we act like someone is going to die when the situation really isn't that serious.
The reason I am saying this is because I use to do it, and I see it happen all the time. People running around in circles in their mind, and verbally as though it's the end of the world when no one is dying or is going to die.
Why do we do it?
We do it because it is a habit, and like I wrote in my last post, Wanting More From Life, we sometimes don't know our own authority and power to govern the mood, and words of our mind.
What I mean by that is, we can consciously sooth our self, and make it a habit, just as we unconsciously work our selves up into a frenzy over no thing.
A really good way to destress is to consciously focus on encouraging the self, and soothing the self into a better mood.
I discovered this for myself when I was a young EMT (Emergency Medical Technician). When I responded to 911 emergency calls, I could, and would sooth anyone on scene, and later learned I developed a really good habit that I used on myself. This habit of soothing myself replaced the all too often freak out factor I learned from my human conditioning.
The best way to calm yourself on a regular basis is through meditation, and a reminder.
You can read a bout meditation by clicking here.
You can create a reminder by repeating to yourself your desired outcome, for example, "I'm alright, and I'm doing really, really, really good!" It sounds silly, yes? But that reminder, any reminder, can, and will help a person calm themselves especially if they have a habit of freaking out over little things.
Try it, you won't be sorry. But don't just try it, make it a habit, and it will help with calming, and building confidence, which is the opposite of stress, which is most often displayed via anger, anxiety, and depression.
That's all I got...
A simple way to change a stressful habit.
Have a wonderful week my friend.
God bless you...
Speak soon...
Elizabeth
Wednesday, April 3, 2019
A Great Way to Destress Yourself
Today, I'd like to discuss a great way of destressing you.
Hey, hey!
How are you doing this day?
I pray you are alright and are taking the time to lift yourself, one day at a time and every day.
As you may notice, I talk about ways to heal the hurt and repeat my posts differently. What I mean is I talk about creating stress relief habits by developing inner peace and quieting the mind a lot but in different ways.
There are three reasons I do this.
First, you will find peace in quieting the mind because it is one of the most potent ways to connect to God.
"Be still and know that I am God." ~Psalm 46:10, Old Testament, Holy Bible, KJV
Second, if I write about it differently, I can and will eventually persuade the stressed person to destress. One way or another, I may convince the suffering individual to choose and use their free agency and power to find relief through focus.
Third, remembering, reminding, and repetition are great ways to recondition stressful habits into destressing habits.
So...
Here I go...
A great way to Destress Yourself is to intentionally enjoy the moment you are in.
We often think of all the things we must do, what may happen tomorrow, or what happened yesterday. If we can intentionally take the time to enjoy the moment we are in, we will discover a great way to relieve stress.
When people are young, it is so easy to have fun and play, but then life sets in, and adults teach us and train us to take life too seriously. Sometimes we are trained out of enjoyment because it is replaced with fear.
So, sometimes we must retrain ourselves in happiness and joy. Sound familiar? If so, try this...
When eating chocolate or a delicious meal, notice every bite, focus on the moment, and enjoy.
And...
When conversing with someone you love or like, notice the time you spend together and enjoy.
This is intentional living.
This is choosing to stop the thoughts of other things and focus on savoring the moments.
One of my favorite things is focusing on the moment I am in. I quiet my mind and focus on the person I am with and where I am. I just quiet my mind and savor the person and place. I find complete enjoyment at that moment. I feel God at that moment.
This is one of my quieting the mind and finding inner peace practices.
Sounds simple, and it is absolutely amazingly fantastic!
Give it a try!
Put savoring into practice, and you can Destress Yourself anytime and anywhere.
Remember, the practice creates permanence.
Have a great day, my dear friend!
Don't forget to have fun!
Choose to be playful!
Short and sweet!
Straight to the meat!
I did it!
Love! Love! Love!
All I got is love for you!
Speak soon...
Elizabeth Stanfill
Hey, hey!
How are you doing this day?
I pray you are alright and are taking the time to lift yourself, one day at a time and every day.
As you may notice, I talk about ways to heal the hurt and repeat my posts differently. What I mean is I talk about creating stress relief habits by developing inner peace and quieting the mind a lot but in different ways.
There are three reasons I do this.
First, you will find peace in quieting the mind because it is one of the most potent ways to connect to God.
"Be still and know that I am God." ~Psalm 46:10, Old Testament, Holy Bible, KJV
Second, if I write about it differently, I can and will eventually persuade the stressed person to destress. One way or another, I may convince the suffering individual to choose and use their free agency and power to find relief through focus.
Third, remembering, reminding, and repetition are great ways to recondition stressful habits into destressing habits.
So...
Here I go...
A great way to Destress Yourself is to intentionally enjoy the moment you are in.
We often think of all the things we must do, what may happen tomorrow, or what happened yesterday. If we can intentionally take the time to enjoy the moment we are in, we will discover a great way to relieve stress.
When people are young, it is so easy to have fun and play, but then life sets in, and adults teach us and train us to take life too seriously. Sometimes we are trained out of enjoyment because it is replaced with fear.
So, sometimes we must retrain ourselves in happiness and joy. Sound familiar? If so, try this...
When eating chocolate or a delicious meal, notice every bite, focus on the moment, and enjoy.
And...
When conversing with someone you love or like, notice the time you spend together and enjoy.
This is intentional living.
This is choosing to stop the thoughts of other things and focus on savoring the moments.
One of my favorite things is focusing on the moment I am in. I quiet my mind and focus on the person I am with and where I am. I just quiet my mind and savor the person and place. I find complete enjoyment at that moment. I feel God at that moment.
This is one of my quieting the mind and finding inner peace practices.
Sounds simple, and it is absolutely amazingly fantastic!
Give it a try!
Put savoring into practice, and you can Destress Yourself anytime and anywhere.
Remember, the practice creates permanence.
Have a great day, my dear friend!
Don't forget to have fun!
Choose to be playful!
Short and sweet!
Straight to the meat!
I did it!
Love! Love! Love!
All I got is love for you!
Speak soon...
Elizabeth Stanfill
If you love what you read here, you may find my books by clicking, books by Elizabeth Stanfill.
Wednesday, March 13, 2019
Questioning Insecurity, i.e., Stress
Hoodie Hoo Boogah Booh!
LOL!
How are you doing today?
You know I pray that you are alright every day!?!
Today I'd like to talk about confidence and insecurity because one brings happiness and the other brings stress.
I am compelled to tell this story...
About seven years ago, I worked at this facility, and one of the security personnel was articulating dissatisfaction concerning his own life. When he was done explaining, I asked him, "Why don't you..." He cut me off and responded rudely, "I know what I am incapable of!" He didn't even let me get a word in.
Furiously, he told me, in so many words, that he did not believe he was good enough or intelligent enough to do anything for himself. I am sharing this story, but not the specifics because the most insecure people would rather argue their limitations and be right about themselves than think a thought in their favor and/or be wrong.
You may agree with the security officer and think, "I'm pretty sure I know my limitations."
I know! That was me too!!! The more insecure and self-conscious I defend my weaknesses, the younger me.
Precarious people believe that their worth is based on being right. It's an illusion and provides a very stressful life. Could you imagine having to be right even if it means sacrificing your happiness, health, love life, or wealth?
Being insecure is the ultimate type of stressful personality because it's a practiced fear.
Some people have doubts about careers, health, money, relationships, or wealth. It's totally normal.
But not every person has insecurity about all or most of those mentioned above. Individuals with severe uncertainty have practiced stress and hold on to being right more than anything.
LOL!
How are you doing today?
You know I pray that you are alright every day!?!
Today I'd like to talk about confidence and insecurity because one brings happiness and the other brings stress.
I am compelled to tell this story...
About seven years ago, I worked at this facility, and one of the security personnel was articulating dissatisfaction concerning his own life. When he was done explaining, I asked him, "Why don't you..." He cut me off and responded rudely, "I know what I am incapable of!" He didn't even let me get a word in.
Furiously, he told me, in so many words, that he did not believe he was good enough or intelligent enough to do anything for himself. I am sharing this story, but not the specifics because the most insecure people would rather argue their limitations and be right about themselves than think a thought in their favor and/or be wrong.
You may agree with the security officer and think, "I'm pretty sure I know my limitations."
I know! That was me too!!! The more insecure and self-conscious I defend my weaknesses, the younger me.
Precarious people believe that their worth is based on being right. It's an illusion and provides a very stressful life. Could you imagine having to be right even if it means sacrificing your happiness, health, love life, or wealth?
Being insecure is the ultimate type of stressful personality because it's a practiced fear.
Some people have doubts about careers, health, money, relationships, or wealth. It's totally normal.
But not every person has insecurity about all or most of those mentioned above. Individuals with severe uncertainty have practiced stress and hold on to being right more than anything.
In other words, their mind is shut to learning, listening, and seeing the evidence. Their mouth is open to their perceived brilliance of what they know about particular things.
Don't believe me? Do you think you have to be right about politics or religion? Do you know someone who has to be right about either subject by pointing out other people's wrongness?
In my younger years, I believed that being right was one of the most important things to me, and that belief supplied me with a very closed mind. As I became more educated, I realized how important it is to open up to understand. Now, I can see the old me in others as they are incapable of communicating because their mind is so shut.
A closed mind is ignorance, and an open mind leads to enlightenment. An open mind learns by listening to understand.
I was angry, anxious, depressed, and full of despair in my younger years. And I spent a lot of time there because I was unwilling to learn from others by listening. My views of myself were narrow, and although, at an intellectual level, I understood that I was responsible for my happiness, I wasn't listening to anyone for solutions. This unstable state made me a coward.
I'm not calling anyone a coward! I said it made me a coward, and it was all because I wouldn't believe in myself enough to even think a thought in my favor. I had to be right more than I had to be happy, healthy, loving, or wealthy. All of which creates confidence and joy.
Here I go again with the practice makes permanent...
In my younger years, I was practicing a closed mind, fearing being wrong because my worth was based on being right, and that practice created only dissatisfaction in life.
Now, in my wiser years ~wink~ I practice learning by listening to understand. I practice understanding that I can look for the truth in anything. No need to agree or disagree, and no need to say a word.
What I am trying to elude to is open your mind to listening IF you are experiencing unhappiness from negative emotions like anger, anxiety, depression, or despair.
If you want happiness, joy, and vitality in your life, please open your mind to suggestions on how to get there, especially from anyone who is hugely successful at being there.
You wouldn't take financial advice from anyone who never has any money or may not even have money at their disposal.
You wouldn't take weight loss advice from someone who is obese and/or has been obese their entire life.
You wouldn't take any relationship advice from anyone who's been divorced several times, twice, or even once.
Part of creating a destressed life is developing confidence, enlightenment, and wisdom by looking at those who are successful at what you want to be successful at. Listen to them, watch them, and discern what you want to do, then do THAT!
I practice calming myself and connecting to God because that is what I want out of life. So, I learn by listening to and watching people who are calm and connected to God.
The old insecure me would only speak complaints and criticism because that was my focus. But now, my focus is on practicing calmness and connecting to God. I am so imperfect at it, so I keep on practicing, never beating myself up, and always trying to have an open mind.
Do you? Could you? Would you believe in yourself enough to question your open-mindedness towards yourself? An open mind leads to confidence, and a closed mind leads to insecurity, which leads to stress.
Just something to think about so that you may relieve your stress of unwanted feelings of fear.
That is all...
Except!!!
I LOVE YOU!!!
God bless...
Take care...
Elizabeth Stanfill
Don't believe me? Do you think you have to be right about politics or religion? Do you know someone who has to be right about either subject by pointing out other people's wrongness?
In my younger years, I believed that being right was one of the most important things to me, and that belief supplied me with a very closed mind. As I became more educated, I realized how important it is to open up to understand. Now, I can see the old me in others as they are incapable of communicating because their mind is so shut.
A closed mind is ignorance, and an open mind leads to enlightenment. An open mind learns by listening to understand.
I was angry, anxious, depressed, and full of despair in my younger years. And I spent a lot of time there because I was unwilling to learn from others by listening. My views of myself were narrow, and although, at an intellectual level, I understood that I was responsible for my happiness, I wasn't listening to anyone for solutions. This unstable state made me a coward.
I'm not calling anyone a coward! I said it made me a coward, and it was all because I wouldn't believe in myself enough to even think a thought in my favor. I had to be right more than I had to be happy, healthy, loving, or wealthy. All of which creates confidence and joy.
Here I go again with the practice makes permanent...
In my younger years, I was practicing a closed mind, fearing being wrong because my worth was based on being right, and that practice created only dissatisfaction in life.
Now, in my wiser years ~wink~ I practice learning by listening to understand. I practice understanding that I can look for the truth in anything. No need to agree or disagree, and no need to say a word.
What I am trying to elude to is open your mind to listening IF you are experiencing unhappiness from negative emotions like anger, anxiety, depression, or despair.
If you want happiness, joy, and vitality in your life, please open your mind to suggestions on how to get there, especially from anyone who is hugely successful at being there.
You wouldn't take financial advice from anyone who never has any money or may not even have money at their disposal.
You wouldn't take weight loss advice from someone who is obese and/or has been obese their entire life.
You wouldn't take any relationship advice from anyone who's been divorced several times, twice, or even once.
Part of creating a destressed life is developing confidence, enlightenment, and wisdom by looking at those who are successful at what you want to be successful at. Listen to them, watch them, and discern what you want to do, then do THAT!
I practice calming myself and connecting to God because that is what I want out of life. So, I learn by listening to and watching people who are calm and connected to God.
The old insecure me would only speak complaints and criticism because that was my focus. But now, my focus is on practicing calmness and connecting to God. I am so imperfect at it, so I keep on practicing, never beating myself up, and always trying to have an open mind.
Do you? Could you? Would you believe in yourself enough to question your open-mindedness towards yourself? An open mind leads to confidence, and a closed mind leads to insecurity, which leads to stress.
Just something to think about so that you may relieve your stress of unwanted feelings of fear.
That is all...
Except!!!
I LOVE YOU!!!
God bless...
Take care...
Elizabeth Stanfill
If you love what you read here, you may find my books by clicking, books by Elizabeth Stanfill.
Sunday, January 20, 2019
Is There a Science to Behavior?
Hey there!
How are you doing?
I'm praying you are okay!
I'm doing pretty good.
I'll tell you a secret... I'm in Texas! I love Texas and Texas loves me!
I guess it's not a secret anymore. No matter... I just love Texas, I'd be living here, but then I'd be too far from my family.
Today, I'd like to write about the science of human behavior and that whatever we practice, we can and will become really good at, and will become a habit.
This is very true when it comes to beliefs and behaviors.
The most important thing to consider about this science is whether it can help or hurt us.
For example, if you have a habit of worrying about the future, money, or a family member, you will be really good at worrying. Worry is basically stress.
Did you know that stress is the number one cause of every illness?
The great news is that we can change any habit we want. With God, all things are possible. I know this is true. I know it deep down in my heart and soul because I have witnessed it in my life and with others.
So the questions are... What kind of habits do you have? Are your habits helping you or hurting you?
We all have bad habits and good habits. Some of us have more bad habits than good, and some have more good than bad.
Our business is our own habits, not anyone else's. Our business is what we do here in this human experience. Our business is between God and ourselves.
Are there stressful habits you'd like to change using the Science of Behavior?
Negative emotions are stressful habits. Anger, anxiety, depression, doubt, fear, irritability, moodiness, and worry are all negative emotions that provoke the stress response, which wreaks havoc in the body. That's what causes illnesses.
If you'd like to change a stressful habit using the Science of Behavior, you have to pick its opposite and practice it until you are really, really, really good at it.
If you get angry, practice patience.
If you get anxious, replace it with relaxation, and practice it into permanence.
If you got depression, replace it with appreciation, and practice it into permanence.
Sounds simple, doesn't it? But not easy.
I'll tell you a secret... I'm in Texas! I love Texas and Texas loves me!
I guess it's not a secret anymore. No matter... I just love Texas, I'd be living here, but then I'd be too far from my family.
Today, I'd like to write about the science of human behavior and that whatever we practice, we can and will become really good at, and will become a habit.
This is very true when it comes to beliefs and behaviors.
The most important thing to consider about this science is whether it can help or hurt us.
For example, if you have a habit of worrying about the future, money, or a family member, you will be really good at worrying. Worry is basically stress.
Did you know that stress is the number one cause of every illness?
The great news is that we can change any habit we want. With God, all things are possible. I know this is true. I know it deep down in my heart and soul because I have witnessed it in my life and with others.
So the questions are... What kind of habits do you have? Are your habits helping you or hurting you?
We all have bad habits and good habits. Some of us have more bad habits than good, and some have more good than bad.
Our business is our own habits, not anyone else's. Our business is what we do here in this human experience. Our business is between God and ourselves.
Are there stressful habits you'd like to change using the Science of Behavior?
Negative emotions are stressful habits. Anger, anxiety, depression, doubt, fear, irritability, moodiness, and worry are all negative emotions that provoke the stress response, which wreaks havoc in the body. That's what causes illnesses.
If you'd like to change a stressful habit using the Science of Behavior, you have to pick its opposite and practice it until you are really, really, really good at it.
If you get angry, practice patience.
If you get anxious, replace it with relaxation, and practice it into permanence.
If you got depression, replace it with appreciation, and practice it into permanence.
Sounds simple, doesn't it? But not easy.
The only thing that can hinder anyone in this endeavor of changing unhealthy habits is the belief one can't, the unwillingness to try, and the pattern that exists because of its momentum of it. That driving force is the power of any habit, and it can be used for our benefit just as it is being used as a hurdle.
So! Your mission, should you choose to accept it, is...
Pick an unhealthy habit, replace it with a healthy one, and practice it into permanence. Do this for at least a week, and if it works, make it permanent.
Then! Watch your stress lift just a little bit more!
Watch yourself destress!
You can do this!
You got the power!
That's it...
Except, I love you, my friend! I do! I do!
God bless...
Take Care...
Elizabeth Stanfill
So! Your mission, should you choose to accept it, is...
Pick an unhealthy habit, replace it with a healthy one, and practice it into permanence. Do this for at least a week, and if it works, make it permanent.
Then! Watch your stress lift just a little bit more!
Watch yourself destress!
You can do this!
You got the power!
That's it...
Except, I love you, my friend! I do! I do!
God bless...
Take Care...
Elizabeth Stanfill
If you love what you read here, you may find my books by clicking, books by Elizabeth Stanfill.
Monday, July 11, 2011
DESTRESSING MYSELF ;)
 |
| AT THE BEACH ;) |
How are you??? Did you have a great weekend? I hope that you are super duper and that you had the best weekend ever.
Man oh man, in my last post, DESTRESS, I mentioned that things were crazy because stress is so unusually high for July. In the summer, I am practically on hiatus, and then stress hits EVERYBODY in October through March. Well, there must be something in the air because I do believe I have had the most stressful time in a long, long time.
The biggest stress events are Death, Destruction, Devastation, Dismemberment, Divorce, and Dying. The SIX D'S. Ha ha ha, I just made that up. It's true though. Think about it! If someone dies, you get stress. If you experience some sort of destruction through man made or natural disaster, you get stress. If you have some sort of devastation like job loss or foreclosure, you get stress. If you experience dismemberment, you get stress. Divorce? Stress! Dying? Stress! Those are the big one's, wouldn't you agree?
Anyway, I have a point to all of this and it is that I experienced a couple of the six. Could you imagine experiencing just one of them? If we experience more than one it could really eff us up, couldn't it?
So, what happened? My Dad was in the hospital, my son moved away to college, and my doggie died. It must of really stressed me out because I got sick. The stomach kind of sick. You know what I mean about the stomach! Things come up and they go down, not so well :(
The reason I am sharing this with you is because I know, with out a doubt, that things can and will affect us so we gotta be prepared. If we are prepared for stress, it is called prevention, sort of ;)
Prevention is what we do before our stress, intervention is what we do while stress is happening, and then direction is the path we take after all the poop hits the fan and dies down a lil bit.
My prevention, for myself, is true education on what stress is. Stress is not our circumstances but how we react to them and our habits of reacting will help us, or not, handle the stressful stuff. When I am really overwhelmed, I have a habit of crying, and then I realize that I am overwhelmed. When I am overwhelmed, I have a habit of being my greatest cheerleader because I tell myself, "you are going to be fine and you can handle this." Then I get down on my knees, ask the Lord for strength and guidance, and then focus on the good.
When my doggie died, my son was there, Thank God, and he sat me down, put his arm around my shoulder, hugged me, and he said to me, "Look at the bright side Mommy, Missy died peacefully in her sleep, she lived a very long cozy life, she wasn't in pain, it was a good thing I was here when it happened (he moved out the next day to college), and all doggies go to heaven." That last part made me laugh.
What wonderful things to say to me and they were all focused on the good. He was my cheerleader that day ;)
Being your own cheerleader, or being with someone who will cheer you on, is a great intervention tool. When we are in the middle of stress we must intervene. My intervention is being my own cheerleader and supporter with the right thoughts, beliefs, and actions. The beach is good too, and that is what I did, I spent the weekend at the beach.
The direction I always take, after a stressful situation, is believing in myself, and knowing that no matter what happens I become a stronger person. In addition, I always get down on my knees and thank the Lord above for all my trials, the strength I am given to endure them, and for the happiness, joy, and peace that comes during and after.
Okay, I am rambling...
Just want you, my friend, to think about prevention, intervention, and direction for your stress so that you can destress yourself. Some things to ponder during stressful times.
Have a great week, okay?!?
Don't forget to have fun, and be playful.
Elizabeth
Saturday, July 2, 2011
DESTRESS
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| HOW TO DESTRESS YOURSELF |
The craziest thing is happening. It is July now and I have more visitors to my blog than EVER! Why is that crazy? Well, the greatest number of visitors to my blog begins in October and tapers off in March. You know, the holidays, then the bills in January, and then tax season. Summer time is usually the slowest time of the year for me.
Stress is high and it shouldn't be because it is Summer time and we should be at the beach enjoying ourselves.
So, let's DESTRESS.
In order to destress, we gotta know what it means.
It means, to get rid of your stress.
So, how do we get rid of our stress.
Stress is caused by thoughts of doubt, fear, and worry. What are you worried about? Bills? Relationship? Your job?
It is so funny when people tell me they know what stresses them out and then they blame some external force like their kids, their spouse, their job, or even the economy. It is funny to me because stress is not an external force. Stress is caused by our reaction to this external stimuli.
When we are stressed, this is what we do; in our mind, we think of the worst thing that can happen. For example, if you have stress at work, in your mind you may play, over and over again, the worst possible scenario and then how you are going to react. Or, if you don't have enough money for your bills, you may think about how you are going to be homeless. Really! This is what we do that causes our stress.
Why do we think about the worst possible thing that can happen? Because it is a habit we have. When we were younger our parents or teachers told us things like, "don't do that or you will get hurt." Or, "If you don't do this (whatever it is), you will fail." It is just a mentality that goes on in our culture.
Honestly, how many times have you told your child not to do something or else something bad will happen? What happens when we do this? We create habits of focusing on the worst outcome.
Trust me, I observe enough human behavior to know this is true.
So, what do we do to destress? We think about the best thing that can happen and then focus on that.
The big question would be, what is your intention? What do you intend to happen? Do you intend to fix your relationship? Do you intend to make more money? Do you intend to have a better life than you do now?
What do you intend to happen today, tomorrow, next week, this year, and even for the next five years?
Do you intend to double your income? Do you intend to lose 100 pounds?
Whatever it is you intend to do, focus on that, and make it a goal.
Go from doubt, fear, and worry to certainty, confidence, and faith.
Eliminate the habit of focusing on the worst thing that can happen and focus only on what you intend to happen. Make this a habit and just watch yourself DESTRESS!
Think about what you want and then tell yourself, "I CAN!" Because you can!
I KNOW THAT THIS IS TRUE.
That's all I got! Just wanted to give a few words of destressing yourself before my favorite weekend of the year!
Have the greatest Fourth of July weekend EVER. Go to the beach, lake, pool, or river, and enjoy yourself.
I LOVE YOU!!! I REALLY DO!!! AND IF YOU KNOW ME, YOU KNOW IT IS TRUE!!!
BIG HUGS!
Elizabeth
Monday, January 24, 2011
HOW DO I DESTRESS MYSELF???
You know the number one question that is asked of me is, "HOW DO I DESTRESS MYSELF?"
What a fully loaded question. The answer?!?
The number one way to destress yourself, no matter what you are going through, is to change your thinking. Better yet, change your way of knowing.
First, you must know that you are the only thinker of your thoughts; therefore, you, and only you, are in charge of your thoughts.
Second, you have to know you have a choice: you can think of faith or doubt, fear, and worry.
Third, you must know you can rid yourself of addictive, stressful behavior.
Fourth, you must know you can replace addictive, stressful behavior with successful practices.
This is simple to see and know but not necessarily easy.
Did you know that many people allow their minds to float on autopilot, with doubt, fear, and worry about the future and anger, frustration, and guilt about the past?
What if you chose to learn to be here, right here, right now? The book, The Power of Now, teaches you how to be fully present, enjoy your present moment and not live in the past or future. What problem do you have right now? This very moment? You don't really, do you? Maybe you have issues you think about and anticipate in the future, but you don't really have anything but this moment, now.
You are the thinker of your thoughts. Choose to enjoy this very moment.
Did you know people worry about the worst thing that could happen rather than anticipating the best thing that could happen? That is the addictive, stressful behavior I am talking about. What is an addiction? My definition of an addiction is something that you cannot stop that is affecting you negatively. Like, drama in a relationship, getting offended quickly and all the time, not liking others "just because", worrying about the future, blaming others for your failures, letting your thoughts and emotions run on autopilot, focusing on what is wrong with your life, focusing on what you don't have, and being way too serious. Need I go on?
Sound familiar?
And stressful behavior is the thoughts and behaviors we inflict upon ourselves that cause stress. Stress is not getting in a car crash; it is caused by what we think about after we crash. Pressure is not losing your job or home; it is caused by what we believe and do about it during and after we lose it.
So, "HOW DO I DESTRESS MYSELF?"
KNOW THAT YOU, AND ONLY YOU, ARE IN CHARGE OF AND CAN CHOOSE YOUR THOUGHTS.
KNOW THAT YOU HAVE A CHOICE. YOU CAN CHOOSE FAITH IN OTHERS AND YOURSELF OVER DOUBT, FEAR, AND WORRY.
KNOW THAT YOU CAN RECOGNIZE AND RID YOURSELF OF ADDICTIVE AND STRESSFUL BEHAVIOR.
AND FINALLY, KNOW THAT YOU CAN REPLACE THAT ADDICTIVE AND STRESSFUL BEHAVIOR WITH SUCCESSFUL PRACTICES, WHICH IS JUST THE OPPOSITE OF THAT BEHAVIOR.
YOU CAN DO IT!!! YOU GOT THE POWER!!! YOU CAN BE, DO, AND HAVE ANYTHING YOU SET YOUR HEART ON!
Sounds so simple, doesn't it? But it is not necessarily easy.
Have a great week, and don't forget to have fun and be playful.
Speak soon...
Elizabeth Stanfill
If you love what you read here, you may find my books by clicking, books by Elizabeth Stanfill.
Tuesday, January 4, 2011
NEW YEAR RESOLUTIONS 2011
Hey there!
Did you make your New Year's Resolutions yet?
Did you read my post, 'DESTRESS YOURSELF 2011' from yesterday?
Well, I was basically pleading with you to make NEW YEAR'S RESOLUTIONS.
You gotta do it, you gotta set goals to move forward.
Now if you have already made some resolutions, please disregard the continued pleading, because here I go.
Whatever is going on in your life, you can make it better. If your life is perfect, you can still set some goals.
But!!! If your life is not perfect, now is the time to make it so. Now is always a good time to make things perfect.
Okay, so, if you don't know what you can do for a NEW YEAR'S RESOLUTION, then let me spark some creativity for you.
Why not go for something BIG!!! Bigger than more money, or a better job, or a better body, or a better relationship. Let's go BIG by changing YOU! Change your stressful habit. Just pick one stressful habit that you may have, and change it.
Let me list some stressful habits...
Always being serious
Unhappy, not enjoying life
Never having fun
Thinking life is hard
Dwelling on what you don't have
Worrying morning, noon, and night
Getting offended and letting the offense race in your mind
Always in a hurry
Low self-confidence
Low self-esteem
Low self-image
Being very critical of self
Being very critical of others
Being Angry
Being Irritable
Being Moody
Being Depressed
Being Anxious
Living life in the constant state of going nowhere
Physical exhaustion
Lacking Spirituality
Any of these sound familiar?
Do you have any of these behaviors?
Behaviors are just habits, you know?
If you have any of these habits, you are contributing to your own unhappiness, your own stress!
So let's de-stress, shall we?
Take the habit you have and make it into a goal. For example, if you are always serious, it is time to be playful. Make your NEW YEAR'S RESOLUTION to be MORE PLAYFUL. If you are always unhappy, it is time to be HAPPY. In other words, your goal is to be happier.
This may sound silly, or it even may not make sense, but this is what de-stressing yourself is all about. It is about finding your stressful habits, eliminating them, and replacing them with successful practices.
All those other unhealthy habits like smoking, drinking, eating too much, or creating drama could all stem from the dissatisfaction in life that may be caused by one or two of the stressful habits mentioned above.
If you have one (or more) of the stressful habits mentioned above, or a stressful habit you know is causing your unhappiness, then turn it into a goal, a NEW YEAR'S RESOLUTION, so that you can de-stress yourself in 2011.
Okay, I am done pleading, FOR TODAY!!!
Have a great day, week, month, and year...
Don't forget to have fun and be playful...
Speak soon...
Elizabeth
Did you make your New Year's Resolutions yet?
Did you read my post, 'DESTRESS YOURSELF 2011' from yesterday?
Well, I was basically pleading with you to make NEW YEAR'S RESOLUTIONS.
You gotta do it, you gotta set goals to move forward.
Now if you have already made some resolutions, please disregard the continued pleading, because here I go.
Whatever is going on in your life, you can make it better. If your life is perfect, you can still set some goals.
But!!! If your life is not perfect, now is the time to make it so. Now is always a good time to make things perfect.
Okay, so, if you don't know what you can do for a NEW YEAR'S RESOLUTION, then let me spark some creativity for you.
Why not go for something BIG!!! Bigger than more money, or a better job, or a better body, or a better relationship. Let's go BIG by changing YOU! Change your stressful habit. Just pick one stressful habit that you may have, and change it.
Let me list some stressful habits...
Always being serious
Unhappy, not enjoying life
Never having fun
Thinking life is hard
Dwelling on what you don't have
Worrying morning, noon, and night
Getting offended and letting the offense race in your mind
Always in a hurry
Low self-confidence
Low self-esteem
Low self-image
Being very critical of self
Being very critical of others
Being Angry
Being Irritable
Being Moody
Being Depressed
Being Anxious
Living life in the constant state of going nowhere
Physical exhaustion
Lacking Spirituality
Any of these sound familiar?
Do you have any of these behaviors?
Behaviors are just habits, you know?
If you have any of these habits, you are contributing to your own unhappiness, your own stress!
So let's de-stress, shall we?
Take the habit you have and make it into a goal. For example, if you are always serious, it is time to be playful. Make your NEW YEAR'S RESOLUTION to be MORE PLAYFUL. If you are always unhappy, it is time to be HAPPY. In other words, your goal is to be happier.
This may sound silly, or it even may not make sense, but this is what de-stressing yourself is all about. It is about finding your stressful habits, eliminating them, and replacing them with successful practices.
All those other unhealthy habits like smoking, drinking, eating too much, or creating drama could all stem from the dissatisfaction in life that may be caused by one or two of the stressful habits mentioned above.
If you have one (or more) of the stressful habits mentioned above, or a stressful habit you know is causing your unhappiness, then turn it into a goal, a NEW YEAR'S RESOLUTION, so that you can de-stress yourself in 2011.
Okay, I am done pleading, FOR TODAY!!!
Have a great day, week, month, and year...
Don't forget to have fun and be playful...
Speak soon...
Elizabeth
Monday, December 20, 2010
STRESSFUL EMOTIONAL HABITS
Gonna talk about stressful, emotional habits today.
When we think of habits, we think of food, cigarettes, alcohol, or drugs. We can also add caffeine, shopping, and sex to that list. These are apparent habits that we are well aware of, and we know the consequences if we continue.
Another habit that may be evaluated is our emotions. When we are presented with a stressful situation, it may be a habit to feel fear or worry.
Some people may even react to stressful situations with anger, frustration, or irritability. These emotions are the cause of our stress. For example, when we work on the car or the house and the job gets complicated, we may get angry, frustrated, or irritable. Sound familiar? This habit of reacting to certain situations is the source of our stress.
Another example may be when we have something big that breaks down, like a car, washer or dryer, air conditioner, or water heater, and we don't have the money to pay for it, we may feel fear or worry. That is another habit we may have of reacting to circumstances that are the culprit of our stress.
When we become aware of the habitual reactions of our emotions, we can take responsibility and change these habits for the better. If we get angry or irritable often, we may have created patterns of anger and irritability, which can be changed through education.
Awareness is the number one key. If we are aware of these adverse emotional reactions, we can take responsibility and change these emotions to the opposite.
We can change anger, frustration, or irritability to patience and tolerance.
We can change doubt, fear, and worry to confidence, security, and hope.
It is not necessary to get angry, frustrated, or irritable. It is not required to have doubt, fear, or worry. We can take control of our reactions.
Sounds simple but is not necessarily easy. The hard part is the 20, 30, 40, or more years of the tendency to react this way.
What can we do to destress our negative habits of reacting?
The first key is awareness. Like an addict, we cannot get help unless we think we need help.
The next step is to talk to a professional or read a book on anger or stress. Bibliotherapy is one of the best ways to change.
Another great way of being aware of our emotions is being aware of our thoughts because it is the thoughts we are having that causes our feelings.
And finally, never-ending goal setting of changing our habits. If we want to change behavior that we have had for years, it may take some time and hard work. Never-ending goal setting is the way to move forward. If we don't move forward, we are stagnant; if we are fixed, our problems get bigger, and if our problems get bigger, that causes an increase in our stress.
If you get angry, frustrated, or irritable frequently, or even once in a while, you are creating great stress on yourself mentally, emotionally, physically, and spiritually. Make it a goal to stop negative emotions and replace them with positive ones like calmness, happiness, satisfaction, and cheerfulness.
You can discover your stressful habits by destressing yourself. When you destress yourself, you learn to change your stressful thoughts, feelings, actions, and attitudes to more successful thoughts, feelings, actions, and attitudes, which means changing stressful habits into successful practices.
Have a super duper week, and don't forget to have fun and be playful.
Elizabeth Stanfill If you love what you read here, you may find my books by clicking, books by Elizabeth Stanfill.
Another habit that may be evaluated is our emotions. When we are presented with a stressful situation, it may be a habit to feel fear or worry.
Some people may even react to stressful situations with anger, frustration, or irritability. These emotions are the cause of our stress. For example, when we work on the car or the house and the job gets complicated, we may get angry, frustrated, or irritable. Sound familiar? This habit of reacting to certain situations is the source of our stress.
Another example may be when we have something big that breaks down, like a car, washer or dryer, air conditioner, or water heater, and we don't have the money to pay for it, we may feel fear or worry. That is another habit we may have of reacting to circumstances that are the culprit of our stress.
When we become aware of the habitual reactions of our emotions, we can take responsibility and change these habits for the better. If we get angry or irritable often, we may have created patterns of anger and irritability, which can be changed through education.
Awareness is the number one key. If we are aware of these adverse emotional reactions, we can take responsibility and change these emotions to the opposite.
We can change anger, frustration, or irritability to patience and tolerance.
We can change doubt, fear, and worry to confidence, security, and hope.
It is not necessary to get angry, frustrated, or irritable. It is not required to have doubt, fear, or worry. We can take control of our reactions.
Sounds simple but is not necessarily easy. The hard part is the 20, 30, 40, or more years of the tendency to react this way.
What can we do to destress our negative habits of reacting?
The first key is awareness. Like an addict, we cannot get help unless we think we need help.
The next step is to talk to a professional or read a book on anger or stress. Bibliotherapy is one of the best ways to change.
Another great way of being aware of our emotions is being aware of our thoughts because it is the thoughts we are having that causes our feelings.
And finally, never-ending goal setting of changing our habits. If we want to change behavior that we have had for years, it may take some time and hard work. Never-ending goal setting is the way to move forward. If we don't move forward, we are stagnant; if we are fixed, our problems get bigger, and if our problems get bigger, that causes an increase in our stress.
If you get angry, frustrated, or irritable frequently, or even once in a while, you are creating great stress on yourself mentally, emotionally, physically, and spiritually. Make it a goal to stop negative emotions and replace them with positive ones like calmness, happiness, satisfaction, and cheerfulness.
You can discover your stressful habits by destressing yourself. When you destress yourself, you learn to change your stressful thoughts, feelings, actions, and attitudes to more successful thoughts, feelings, actions, and attitudes, which means changing stressful habits into successful practices.
Have a super duper week, and don't forget to have fun and be playful.
Elizabeth Stanfill If you love what you read here, you may find my books by clicking, books by Elizabeth Stanfill.
Monday, December 6, 2010
OF COURSE IT'S STRESS!!!
What causes stress? Most people think that stressful events cause our stress but actually, what causes stress is how we react to and think about the event.
For example, death is a very stressful event, wouldn't you say? What causes the level of stress, in this situation, really depends on how a person reacts to and thinks about death. If one person thinks that there is no life, NOTHING, after death and he or she will never see their deceased loved one again, their stress level will be significantly high. If another person thinks that there is life after death and they will see their deceased loved one again, after their own death, their stress level will be significantly lower than the first individual. We must also take into account how well the person deals with stress.
I have recently seen this particular reaction. Recently, two friends of mine have experienced the death of a close loved one. The first person, we will call him Fort (I don't know anyone named Fort, he he he), lost his spouse, and the second person, we will call him Hub (I don't know anyone named Hub either, ha ha ha), lost his long-time significant other (never married in other words). Fort has a strong faith in the plan of salvation, believes in eternal marriage, and handles stress very well. Hub, on the other hand, has faith in God, but not a very strong faith, and is horrible at handling stress.
Immediately during and after each funeral service Fort was strong and happy, celebrating his deceased spouse's life and Hub was very miserable, and displaying illnesses like headaches and abdominal problems. There is a lot more to these stories than what I have shared but the foundation of it all is this; Fort has faith and handles stress well therefore, his stress was very low. Hub has not so strong faith and handles stress not so well therefore, his stress level is high and he sustained illnesses.
The purpose of this post is to show you that 1) your level of stress is not caused by your situation 2) your level of stress is caused by how you think about your situation (FAITH) and how you react to your situation and 3) stress does, and will, cause severe illnesses if you do not learn how to destress yourself.
If you are dealing with a physical illness, I know that if you learn how to destress yourself (which just means to think and react differently than you do to stressful situations) you can overcome your illness, I know this because I have seen it happen time and time again. Many people have come to me with headaches, stomach problems, muscle aches, anxiousness, sadness, neck pain, back pain, and many many other problems, and once they learned to destress they overcame them! On the same note, many people never learn to overcome their stressful habits of doubt, fear, and worry and they continue to sustain their illnesses and they get worse.
YOU GOT THE POWER! YOU CAN LEARN TO DESTRESS YOURSELF AND CREATE GREAT HEALTH, HAPPINESS, ENERGY, AND VITALITY! I AM A WITNESS TO THAT!
Until the next post, don't forget to have fun and be playful...
Elizabeth
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