Hello! Happy Fourth of July!
How are you doing my friend? Summer is here and I hope with all my heart and soul that you are alright, and that you are able to enjoy this wonderful season.
If you are not able to enjoy this time in your life, may I please suggest three things you may try to destress right now?
To destress is to remove the emotional, mental, and physical strain from your life.
If you are really good at stressing out then you may have had a lot of practice. Therefore, it is time to practice destressing so you may get really good at destressing yourself.
So, the three ways to destress right now:
Number One... Releasing your stress by taking a deep breath, and activating the relaxation response.
This may seem cliche and down right irritating but please, let me explain. When anyone is in the middle of deep stress like anger or anxiety, he or she may want to fight or flee. Meaning, reacting without thinking, which is the physiological stress response.
If you are being chased by someone who is trying to kill you, the stress response is there to help you. However, if you are not being chased by anyone, and are reacting to something out of pure, "I do not want this to happen, it is making me afraid, and I won't be okay," you, quite possibly, may have a habit from a stressful personality.
If you are stressed on a regular basis, to interrupt that stress with a deep breath can change your attitude and beliefs about life. If you don't believe it, I would just plead with you to believe in you! If you don't believe in you, believe in God, for with God all things are possible. Trust me on this.
This deep breath exercise is the relaxation response, which is opposite the stress response. It's about replacing the stress with relaxation.
When people find out I research, and teach destressing individuals, and myself, they quite often ask me what is the best way to relieve anxiety, aka stress.
Some people can hear the, continued application of a behavior makes permanent, theory. Practicing anxiety, aka fear in the moment and future, or practicing relaxation, aka faith in the moment and future, can and will make perfect permanence. Whichever an individual chooses to exercise can, and will become a habit.
In spite of this theory of application, many people who ask for relief get really angry at the words I provide, as though there is no way practicing will help.
It is my suspicion these individuals believe if relieving anxiety by relaxing was the answer, and that easy, they'd have done it ages ago. The truth is, it is not easy. Relaxing is rather basic and fundamental, but not easy.
If a person has the desire to relieve stress, applying this on a regular basis, particularly when stressed, will create relief more and more. The relief may not come right away, especially if a person has exercised doubt, fear, and/or worry for a long time.
Praying my prelude has persuaded you to practice yourself into destressing with the relaxation response.
The deep breath relaxation response:
Consciously take a slow deep breath in through your nose, filling your lungs to full capacity as you feel the pressure of your lungs push down on your diaphragm (the major muscle below the lungs), hold for a few seconds acknowledging the influence, and then slowly exhale through your mouth. As you slowly exhale, imagine your stressful situation being exhaled out with your breath, and taken away by the wind. Then allow your entire body to give way to gravity, and relax.
If stress comes from our thoughts about a situation, and it often does, decreasing stress can be as simple as using our creative, and critical imagination skills. Our imagination is used to get us into deep stress by doubt, fear, and worry of the mind, which is sometimes practiced into perfection, and permanence.
You may be saying, this is the most silliest exercise I have ever heard of. In spite of that, it is one of the most successful in relieving many peoples' stress, including mine. Many years ago, I used to be one stressed out Single Mama.
If an individual would make a commitment to experiment with this for at least one month, preferably a year, I am confident he or she will see desired results in the area of calm confidence.
This exercise is also very helpful to so many of the individuals I have had the blessing to assist with overcoming critical stress and despair.
You can do this deep breathing exercise anytime, and anywhere, especially in times of having to wait. It's a great way to practice patience.
"Knowing this, that the trying of your faith worketh patience." ~James 1:3, Holy Bible, New Testament, KJV
Faith and patience are calm, confidence, and relaxation, and fear and impatience are anger, anxiety, and stress.
Number two... Go for a ten minute walk.
This is a magnificent way to relieve stress but there is more to it than walking away. The thing is, if a person goes for a walk and plays the stress in his or her mind over and over again, he or she will practice stress. This is a no no!
The ten minute walk can, and will minimize stress if the person intentionally centers his or her attention on the best thoughts he or she could have in this moment. What are the best thoughts? They are either appreciation or desire.
If you are stressed and you go for a ten minute walk, you could ask yourself, "what is good about this situation that I can be grateful for?" Or, "what do I want to happen?"
You may be familiar with these methods of shifting your mind to a more faithful focus, or you may think this ridiculous.
Either way, could you imagine the habit of governing your focus after putting one of these options into permanent practice?
Do you know those people whose lives seem to be perfect? It's because they focus on appreciation and desire. That is what makes them so positive.
Nobody's life is perfect or exempt from devastation. Regardless, everyone is given the perfect law of liberty to be free to choose how he or she will think about any given thing. We can choose faith or fear. Faith or fear, is just a thought away.
If you find this too difficult, and some people do, you could do the first exercise, practicing relaxation, while you go for your ten minute walk.
If I may say something with all the love in my heart, and I have a prayer you can and will see the truth rather than be hurt because some people are hurt by these words.
Some people are convinced of the human conditioning of fear, and believe with all their might, we have to be afraid of the future, and that we have to be angry, or anxious. In my consideration, from experience, this is false. We don't have to be fearful. The truth is, we are spiritual beings, and are born with the fruit of the spirit, which is our spiritual nature.
"But the fruit of the Spirit is love, joy, peace, longsuffering, gentleness, goodness, and faith." Galatians 5:22, Holy Bible, New Testament, KJV
Human conditioning teaches us, and convinces some that we have to hate, have misery, have conflict, be impatient, be malicious, be bad, and fear, which are all opposites of the biblical quote above.
We have the freedom to choose whether we live by our spiritual nature or by human conditioning via application and practice.
Number three... Call your best friend, vent, and let it go!
This is brilliant but there are guidelines, which are, tell the story in less than fifteen minutes and then let it go! Let it go!
People who have the let it go habit are much happier than those that wallow in it for days, and sometimes years. You know what I'm talking about!
If you tell the stressful story over and over and over, you relive it, get momentum on your stress, and then practice stress into perfection.
Do you know there are people telling the same stressful story a day later, a month later, a year later, five years later, and/or even ten to fifteen years later? Some people think this is normal, but the only thing it is, is stressful. Reliving one's stress is what makes a person crazy, and I'm not talking a good crazy, I'm talking the kind of crazy that is a repellent to opportunities, and people.
I am so sorry if you find my words harsh and unkind. Please forgive me, it is not my intention to hurt anyone, it is my goal to be a healing help. Still, in order to heal we must seek the truth. The truth is anyone can let anything go, and it's a healthy habit to have.
Let it go!
You could do all three ways to destress right now, all at once, by going for a ten minute walk, calling your best friend to vent, and then deep breath letting it go with relaxation and releasing.
Perfected permanence comes by practice.
Once upon a time, there was a twenty one year old young man who asked me if I was nervous, because I was about to do something that would make normal people nervous (more specifics in another post ~wink~). My reply to him was a resounding, "No!"
Through a very sarcastic tone, this young man said to me,"Oh, you're not human? You're not normal? You have super powers?"
Without thinking, I laughed out loud. I found his behavior towards me hilarious. Definitely not the kindest reaction. I'm sorry, I'm imperfect.
The exercises I present to you above are habits for me. These habits are my skill sets I've developed by desire because I believe in long term satisfaction over short term gratification. These abilities I have applied through many years of living, have given me respite from a very conditioned, pressured personality.
I've changed in my living for the better on purpose.
My words to the young man were, "When you get to my lovely age, you'd hope to get over nervousness and stress or you may have to live on antacids."
In fact, I know twenty one year old's who live on antacids and stomach medications, and I also know they could eliminate the medications if they learned to manage their stress. Stress is the number one cause of every illness.
Health is spiritual, health comes from faith. Illness is human conditioning, and comes from fear. When we fear, toxic hormones are released into our body and becomes an internal poisonous bath.But, please, do not believe me! See for yourself by practicing destressing yourself. It's a spiritual experiment and journey.