Monday, May 14, 2012

DESTRESS YOUR ANGER

Hello there!  How are you this beautiful Monday?  Dang!  I feel so lucky to live in Cali.  We have beautiful blue skies and the temp is a lovely 62 deez greez.  A lil cool for us Californians.

Okay, enough of the bragging, huh?


Today, I wanna talk about destressing your anger. 


Anger is a very stressful habit.  Yuppers, it's a habit.  I would even go as far as to say that it is an addiction, a very contagious addiction.  What I mean by addiction is that it is something that is a negative influence and you cannot quit it.  What I mean by contagious addiction is that an angry environment, like a work place, can create and increase other peoples' anger.  For example, a fire house, or an emergency room, or just being in an ambulance with an angry person.  Also, a corporate or office environment can generate anger in individuals.


There are a whole lotta people out there who are very angry.  Sometimes they don't even know they are angry.  Other times they think anger is okay.  But the worst of them all is they think anger is necessary.


ANGER IS UNNECESSARY!  AND GOING OFF IS NOT OKAY! 


Just in case you didn't know, it is not okay to go off on someone when you loose your temper.  Actually, it's not okay to go off on anyone.  It's quite ridiculous actually.  Have you ever seen someone loose it over something as if their life was threatened?  That is an illusion of anger.   


Not only is anger unnecessary, it is bad for you.


Any negative emotion creates unhealthy shifts in your body and releases bad hormones.  That is why people get sick when they are stressed.


BUT!  Anger just doesn't hurt you, it hurts the people around you and guess what?  If you are an angry one, people probably don't want to be around you.


So, what do you do if you are an angry one?  How do you
destress yourself from anger?

I have no idea!  Count to ten!  JUST KIDDING ;0)


But seriously!


Like any addiction, you have to know that it is a problem, know that you can quit it, and then replace it with a successful practice.


Sounds pretty simple, but not easy.


Once upon a time, a long long time ago, I worked on an ambulance with a very very angry person.  He was so angry that it radiated to me and I started to get angry.  This is way before I started researching and writing about stress relief. 
Thank goodness I didn't work with this guy for long. 

Any who, looking back, I recognized that I was angry, a lot, and for no reason.  After I started to notice my anger, I would ask myself, "why am I so angry?" right in the middle of the anger and then I would talk myself out of the anger.  I would say, "you are getting angry for no reason, Elizabeth."  After doing that for a while, every time I got angry, the anger went away.  Sure, I still got angry, sometimes, but not the kind that was ridiculous.


If you have an anger problem know two things, know that it is not okay because you are hurting yourself and know that you can eliminate it.


Say to yourself, "Anger is not okay and I don't get angry."  I know, it sounds silly, but it will work.  Just keep saying it to yourself when you feel yourself getting angry, and once in a while throughout the day.


It's just a reminder, to remind you, that it's not okay and you don't get angry anymore.


There's more!


When you are angry, see if you can just observe the anger, right when you are in the middle of it.  Just observe it, be the observer, and don't judge it or label it or beat yourself up for it.


Then you can do what I did and talk yourself out of it, or you can do something even funnier.  You can start to sing a song, a funny song, like a rap or something.  Pick a song, any song, and whenever you start to get angry, sing it in your head, or even out loud.  This will work, I promise, it will make you laugh and you will eliminate the stressful habit of anger and replace it with the successful practice of laughter.


You gotta love it!  You gotta love the playfulness in that, don't you?


Well, have a great week and don't forget to have fun and be playful.


Love ya...


Elizabeth